guest post...

alright folks...todays post is from my "sister in law" amiee....shes an amazing woman of god...if only her and zach lived closer...

check out her very own blog {here}

thanks amiee!!!

Confessions of a Married Woman

Zach and I tied the knot on 10-10-10….about a year and 7 months ago. We did many things to prepare for marriage, with the hopes of gaining all the tools we possible could to do marriage well. We did premarital counseling, we read a book and did a workbook together (Saving your Marriage Before it Starts, it’s a good one!), we were surrounded by healthy marriages to glean wisdom from, we kept boundaries, we discussed things, etc. Oh and prior to our engagement/marriage we did 2 years of Anthem, which indirectly prepared us in ways that aren’t average or normal I think.

But, out of all that preparing there are seriously some things that are impossible to prepare for. The UNPREPARABLES! And all the married people say, SO TRUE! Some things you just get to endure and learn from as they come. Which is true in pretty much all aspects, situations, and changes in life, right?

The biggest UNPREPARABLE for me has been Jesus. No, Jesus hasn’t changed since we got married. He’s the same yesterday, today, and forever. But, my life on the other hand has drastically changed since we got married; my schedule, my routine, my priorities, the way I spend my time—and all of these directly affect my relationship with Jesus. It’s been a struggle for me to keep JESUS priority #1 because Zach became my top priority.

As a wife how do you balance your relationship with your husband and your relationship with Jesus?

I used be pretty disciplined and consistent with reading my bible, journaling what God’s speaking to me, and my prayer life. Jesus was my number one go to for all the issues, concerns, needs, worries, burdens, etc of my life. Since we’ve gotten married I’ve found that my tendency is to go to Zach first when I have emotional needs to be filled, or problems, or concerns, or love that I need to feel. Now, God obviously gave me Zach as my husband to love me, listen to me, help me through hard times, rejoice through good times, etc, but looking at the past and the present, I know that I have neglected my relationship with the Lord to an extent and put some things that only Jesus can do and be for me on Zach.

This is the danger zone, and this is the thing I am still figuring out with the rest of you. There is a spot in my heart that longs to hear I am beautiful, lovely, treasured, wanted….my husband fills some of that, but I cannot expect him to be God. The God that knows all my thoughts, the innermost parts of me. The God that knew me before I was born. The God that knows everything I need before I even ask. That is setting Zach up to fail! So, I’ve asked the Lord to fill the spots in my heart that only He can fill and to show me when I’m running to Zach with things that I should be running to him with first. He’s a loving God that knows my tendencies and will guide me in this area of life that comes with the transition of marriage.