my view on mom shaming and comparing

I think most moms have an opinion on this and pretty much every blogger has written about it. But I just wanted to share my opinion on "mom shaming" and why I can't keep up.  I've only been at it 11 months now and to be honest, I'm exhausted from it.

I'm tired of worrying about if my kid "measures" up to the kid that was born the same day as him, or the kid that was born two weeks after him who is already walking.

The things my sons accomplishes are not a reflection on my parenting skills. I have to tell myself that every day. He's not, not walking because I didn't make him walk those extra 10 steps behind the musical push thing. (technical term there) He's not, not wearing 12 month clothes because I'm not feeding him all the right things.

I mean my son doesn't even have sunscreen on in this picture.  How do I even know what sunscreen to put on him that won't kill him? 

Whatever.

I'm going to be totally honest, getting ready to switch my son from bottle feedings to full time solid foods, FREAKS ME OUT! I feel like I'm not going to feed him right, feed him the things he should be eating, give him the right nutrition, etc. And believe me, I've looked on Pinterest and pinned 10,000,000 articles about it but it still makes me crazy. I see these "perfect" moms who grow their own food, feed their kids balanced meals on organic plates, and "organic water" (because I'm sure that is a real thing out there somewhere). I'm not going to be that mom.  I'm just not.  My son will eat white bread sometimes, hot dogs sometimes, cereal probably, cheese puffs, processed food, even McDonalds. It'll be ok and he will survive.  Guarantee it. Maybe he wants to eat soap while you go to the bathroom.(see picture below). 

My mom tells me things that I ate and did and guess what.  I survived.

It never ends. The list goes on and on.

Do I use essential oils on my 11 month old, do I give him water or milk or juice, do I use Johnson and Johnson products?  Don't even get me started on coconut oil now. Sigh.

Back to my main point.  It doesn't really matter what other moms do, does it? I mean what's good for my family isn't going to be good for your family.  If a mom wants to co-sleep so she can get some sleep, its ok. It's none of your business. If a mom wants to put her baby in their crib from the first day they get home, its ok.  It's none of your business.

Be you and be the mom that God created you to be. If you want to let your child scream the whole time at the store, that's ok. It works for you. And it's NO ONE'S business.

If you want to let your son climb in the dishwasher all while taking a picture of him instead of worrying about him falling off. That's ok. 

Stop staring at other parents whether its for sympathy or judgement. When a child is screaming that parent is already feeling judged and not looking at you to see if you have caring or judgey eyes.  If you want to do something, go up to them and say, "you're doing a great job, is there anything I can do to help?"

Because mom's...YOU'RE DOING A GREAT JOB!!! Your child is alive. And that's all we can ask for these days. You're family is perfect in it's own way.  If we were all the same then the world would be too boring. Love each other and encourage. If we all feel like failures then we can't raise children who believe in themselves. Because believe it or not, they can tell when you're down and eventually they will figure out whats getting to you.

in to everything

Rylan is in to everything.  At almost 11 months he is crawling, climbing, pulling on, and chewing everything! He's my absolute favorite and I am so lucky that I get to be his momma!  I feel like it's really pointless to put all the toys away for the night because it starts bright and early with just tearing them all out again.  But it's ok because hes happy and that makes me happy! Momma loves you big boy!

He obviously doesn't have enough toys.  No matter where I put them or how I store them, they all have to be out. I have waited for so long to see toys all over the floor that this site actually makes me happy!

There is a trend starting.  My son is either in pajamas or is half dressed. He loves to be in just his diaper. Apparently, that's how I was when I was little.  A boy after his mommas heart!

So, he's not "allowed" to have this remote.  But every day hes manages to find it.  We hide it different places and he always sniffs it out.  As you can see he is SUPER proud of himself. Gosh he's cute.

Movies everywhere. He will sit and stare at the covers for minutes.  I think hes trying to figure out why the people are staring at him because he only stares at the ones with faces on the front.  Castaway is his favorite to stare down.

<3

this guy. happy first father's day

This guy. You guys.  There aren't any words to describe the love I have for this man.  Seeing him turn in to a father has been the most amazing experience.  There are so things about him that I'm thankful and love him for, but the most important one is the way he loves our son.  

Thank you for loving our son in the most selfless way from the very beginning! I love you!

 <3

bathing suit shopping - mom edition

First of all...what in the world.  Are bathing suits even bathing suits anymore.  I feel like I'm shopping for something someone would wear in a porno. Yikes.

Target - $39.99

Target - $39.99

 

 

 

 

Cupshe - $23.99

 

 

Cupshe - 26.99

Fairy Season - $10.39

Fairy Season - $11.69

 

 

Victoria's Secret - $49.99

Here are a few options to chose from.  These sites are pretty amazing. (no I'm not getting paid for this post)  I have ordered suits from all these sites and have not been disappointed. I will tell you that the Fairy Season suits are a little on the cheaper made side, but for around $10 you can't beat it.  They do take forever and run a little small due to the fact they are coming from China.

I'm not in to the whole tankini thing but all of those sites do have some selection for those too!!  I tried Old Navy but just didn't find anything there that I thought was fitting for my 10 month post pregnancy belly. :) I'm working on it but not quite there yet.

I only found one at Vickie's that I really thought was appropriate for my body.  There are mom's out there that can wear bikinis and look amazing but for me...nope. I like the high wasted because they cover more but I just can't bring myself to wear an itsy bitsy anymore.

I LOVE SUMMER!!!!

<3

6.11.17 - our sunday, on tuesday

1.Woke up at 6:15.

2. Snuggles, of course.

3. Play with alllll the toys. All of them. (he doesn't have enough...jk)

4. Go for a long walk, which I wasn't prepared for. (2 hrs people, ugh)

5. Swing on swings. (I didn't save the video and it makes me sad) :(

6. Walk awkwardly in to the library during a church service to go to the bathroom. (oops)

                                

7. Rylan falls asleep on the way home. (sigh..no morning nap)

8. Daddy wakes up and we spend time with him.

9. Daddy goes to work. :(

10. We fall asleep in the chair for 2.5 hrs. :)

11. We go outside and play in our new pool. :)

 

 12. BUBBLES. (which is sadly didn't get a video of because 

it's hard blowing bubbles and trying to take a video at the same time)

13. Before bed snuggles.

14. Bedtime.

motherhood has made me quiet.

 Motherhood has made me quiet, and I'm ok with it. I had this profound post planned and now that I'm here I don't feel like I can do it justice with my words. How do you explain that motherhood has made you quiet.  I don't talk like I used to, I don't just hang out with people to hang out with them, I don't just carry on a conversation with someone to occupy my time. Priorities shift and change.

There's nothing really to talk about other than my child. He is my life.  I mean I work and of course I have my husband who is my best friend but other than that I don't do much. My life is consumed with my family, mostly my baby boy.  I go to work M-F and I come home and get to take care of him.  On the weekends, I wake up with him and we are together all day. And I love it. But it has made me quiet.  I used to talk about anything and everything just to talk because there was nothing else in my life that consumed my time like he does.

Some other mothers get it, some other mothers don't. And then there are people who are just getting married and don't have children, there are people who are trying to have children and can't, there are people who don't want children. Do I just blabber on about my child to them? Some people just don't want to hear about your child's poop that day or that he can now say "up".

Don't get me wrong. There are times when I just want to talk about nothing, but when I try all that comes out are things about Rylan, or my husband, or my time with my little family. And again, I'm ok with it. But some people...they look at you like, "oh that's nice", lets move on.

I think about all the time we spent waiting for him and all the time spent going through fertility treatments just to be able to have him.  So now that he is here, I don't want to just fill my time with empty words.  My words mean something now.  I want to just be with him, watch him, help him learn new things. Let him know that he's my world and I wouldn't do anything to change it.

They don't fall on deaf ears anymore.  I know he's only 10 months old, but he does hear and pick up on every word I say. I don't want him to hear my negativity or blah blah talk.  I want him to understand that every word means something, that words are important. 

I don't know if I'm even making sense at this point, so I'll stop.

<3

Rylan's First Birthday - O-Fishally-One

So I'm starting to plan Rylan's first birthday.  (insert big ugly cry) I cannot believe my baby is going to be one.  I know all moms probably say that but it's real you guys. It's a sad and overwhelming feeling. How has this tiny human, who I just held for the very first time, ONE? 

Anyway...my inspiration is pinspiration. All of these images are from Pinterest, I didn't link to the original sources because well I just didn't feel like taking the time to do it. 

We decided to go with a fishing theme because not many people around here have done that idea. Most people do the Mr. Onederful or the Woodland theme.  I wanted to be as unique as possible and after wracking my brain for weeks and weeks, I caved to Pinterest and found these cute parties to copy inspire me. I plan on making some of the stuff, but honestly since having Rylan I've cut down on crafting a ton.  Simply because I just don't have the time. 

 I'm so excited to plan his party, but again, it makes me so very sad that my wittle baby is growing up. It's inevitable I get it, but it doesn't make it any easier.

<3